Get ready – we are at the halfway point in the season and your illustrious Commish learned how to make videos, so the 2018 #GMRRFFA season is officially taking off!
Halfway through, it remains pretty consistent at the top of the rankings (even if the week-to-week rankings change); Tito Galen, Garcia, Dorne, Makese and FIL are the top 5 for the third week in a row. That said, the rest of the league is unsettled, like #Smeet’s stomach after a visit to Dairy Queen.
Before we get in to the power rankings, here’s a quick look at the playoff picture if the season ended:
1. FIL (5-1) vs. 8. The Sausage King (3-3)
2. Makese (5-1) vs. 7. Stabs (3-3)
3. LKA! (4-2) vs 6. Carlos (3-3)
4. Dorne (4-2) vs. 5. Tito Galen (3-3)
9. Unicorn (3-3)
10. Coop (3-3)
Don’t ask me how I did them; just trust that they are accurate and remember head-to-head wins are the ultimate tie-breaker.
In absolutely unsurprising news, we have a new #14…
14. Bad Journeys (Smeet)
Record: 0-6
Last Ranking: 13th
Analysis: If you have questions for Smeet’s mailbag column (coming tomorrow), email him at Smeetquestions@gmail.com. Otherwise, he’s lost six in a row and ultimately won’t win until Week 9. No more wasted ink beyond highlighting his FANTASTIC mail bag…
13. The Pain Train (Fredo Maisel)
Record: 2-4
Last Ranking: 12th
Analysis: If you’re counting along at home, Fredo Maisel is officially on a four-game losing streak after being lambasted by FIL. The good news? This streak is hitting seven games at least, with the resurgent Unicorn, Tito Galen and LKA! over the next three weeks. A lot of this has to do with his love for all things Cleveland Browns; in the first three weeks, Carlos Hyde averaged 16+, but he’s down to 9. Meanwhile, Jarvis Landry averaged 18 in Weeks 1-3, but has dipped to 9.5 since. Meanwhile, Chris Hogan has scored under 28 points since joining the Pain Train. Golden Tate on the other hand dropped 35 points in Week 4 and collected 58 points over four weeks (including a Week 6 bye). This trade remains the frontrunner for the Kamara-Williams Award at the end of the season…
12. In Bob Mueller we Trust (Toby)
Record: 2-4
Last Ranking: 14th
Analysis: I’ll give him credit for the win, but Toby probably got a bit lucky when he dropped 132 points on Makese last week after averaging below 100 points in the five weeks before. The win was mostly from folks like OJ Howard and Chris Godwin exceeding the season averages by 4-5 points and Doug Baldwin actually playing in Week 6. I’m reluctant to believe Toby is viable after one outlier performance, but he’s only 1 game out of the playoffs so anything is possible.
11. Trubisky Business (Commish)
Record: 2-4
Last Ranking: 8th
Analysis: Sigh… In my four losses this season, I’m averaging just 124 points (all in the 120s) and the season is seriously teetering on a lost cause – the next three weeks are critical with my opponents having a combined 6-12 record (sure Smeet’s involved but its still accurate). I’m quietly tied for 6th best scoring in the league and all three of my upcoming opponents are below me, so there’s hope. This week, I’ll face off against Coop, and his dismal three-week performance in Weeks 4-6 where he’s averaged just 107 points. So, there’s that…
10. Denver ponyboys (Carlos)
Record: 3-3
Last Ranking: 7th
Analysis: I think Carlos’ squad has reached a ceiling of late, especially with Leonard Fournete remaining on the shelf. He has some studs – Gordon, Hill, Ertz – but this is the same guy starting a TE at Flex this week (Cameron Brate) and the Texans’ 3rd WR. I actually liked the trade where he sent Brady to LKA! last week, adding Royce Freeman and Andrew Luck, but the Denver RB situation remains in flux. He has a big match-up with Makese this week, who is limited roster-wise based on bye weeks and injuries.
9. Dead Sea (Unicorn)
Record: 3-3
Last Ranking: 11th
Analysis: The Dead Sea has risen! He thumped LKA! while posting his highest totals of the season and now he gets the ghost-formerly-known-as-Fredo Maisel in Week 7, so a fourth straight victory is well within his grasp. That said, we need to see the Unicorn post real numbers consistently to really believe he’s once again a viable threat. I’m super excited for potential WhatsApp comments on Joe Flacco this week but beyond Zeke I’m not sure where he’s bringing in significant points with this roster.
8. Lets Eat a God Damn Snack (Stabs)
Record: 3-3
Last Ranking: 6th
Analysis: For the love of God, Todd Gurley deserves better than this. The dude has posted more than 25 points in every game this season, averages just shy of 31 per week, and is carrying the carcass of a would-be contender. At some point, Stabs’ luck with Wide Receivers will turn around, but now he’s lost Devonta Freeman to the IR and, maybe for the better, Quincy Enuwa is out this week, the same guy who has produced -0.1 total for Stabs over the last two weeks. More concerning for Stabs, he’s failed to break 100 points in the last two weeks, but as always Smeet is here to help him out in Week 7.
7. Kerryon my Wayward Johnson (Coop)
Record: 3-3
Last Ranking: 10th
Analysis: Needless to say, but Coop has had a tough schedule to start the season, with his opponents combining for a 22-14 record overall, but his next five opponents are a combined 11-22 (ie the bottom 5 teams in today’s power rankings), so there’s definitely hope. As I mentioned earlier though his performance hasn’t been lights-out like other 3-3 teams since Week 3 (Tito Galen or even the Sausage King). Since Week 4, his best scoring output was 10th in Week 5 and his Week 6 opponent failed to break 100, so he’s actually quite lucky to be 1-2 in his last three.
6. Vienna Sausages (The Sausage King)
Record: 3-3
Last Ranking: 9th
Analysis: The Sausage King is riding high on a two week winning streak over Fredo and Carlos, and I’m excited to see how this shakes up, but the Vienna Sausages have an absolutely brutal road ahead – LKA!, Toby, Makese, FIL, Tito Galen – which is probably the toughest five game clip (sans Toby) in the league this season. This week gets tougher with four of his starters – including Connor, Brown and Cooper – all on byes against LKA!
5. Dorne Diredonkeys (Mark)
Record: 4-2
Last Ranking: 5th
Analysis: Mark may be riding a two-game win streak heading in to battle with Tito Galen, but I remain unconvinced he’s a legit contender. He’s tied for 6th overall in scoring, but aside from a Week 1 outburst of 171 points, Dorne is averaging just 124 points, which would be just 9th best in the league. Patrick Mahomes and Michael Thomas have overshadowed Dorne’s running back situation; none of his rostered RBs have posted back-to-back double digit points, meaning his roster (like mine) of RB options is a legitimate crapshoot. His four wins this season have come against opponents with a combined 8-16 record, but his losses have come to both Makese and LKA! (combined 10-2).
4. Likghts Kamara Action! (Garcia)
Record: 4-2
Last Ranking: 2nd
Analysis: A week after losing to Cinderella Makese, LKA! dropped another clunker, posting a season-low 115 in being soundly defeated by the Unicorn, thanks in to some part to byes for Alvin Kamara and Golden Tate. That said, I’d remain fairly confident Garcia’s squad will remain in the top four heading in to the post season, especially with the emergence of Christian Kirk as a viable FLEX option for the purveyor of death. Kirk is averaging just under 14 points per game over his last four and his steady growth in to the Arizona #1 WR could ultimately fill one of the few holes in LKA!’s lineup. Meanwhile, poor Julio Jones still doesn’t have a touchdown, but he is the 6th best WR in fantasy, averaging 118 yards per game, less than a yard behind #1 fantasy WR Adam Thielen . Yikes…
3. Team Motley (Makese)
Record: 5-1
Last Ranking: 1st
Analysis: The birthday boy of course stumbled once he took the top of last week’s power rankings, which was disappointing considering it was Toby who knocked him off. The loss highlights a fatal flaw in Makese’s roster besides an over-reliance on Raiders players… he simply doesn’t have any home run hitters, even with Joe Mixon healthy. His roster lacks a consistent 20-point performer currently – no non-QB player on his roster averages more than 18 points per game (and that’s Cooper Kupp). By comparison, Tito Galen has FIVE non-QBs averaging 18+, LKA! has four, and FIL has three.
2. The Big Gronkowski (Tito Galen)
Record: 3-3
Last Ranking: 4th
Analysis: To no one’s surprise, Tito Galen has shaken off a tough 1-3 start to climb to .500 but he’s also now quietly leading the league in scoring, averaging 155 points per game while posting the highest score in #GMRRFFA two weeks in a row. Heading in to Week 7, he likely faces his toughest stretch of the season with Dorne, FIL and Makese over the next four weeks (poor Fredo Maisel in Week 8 too). His only real hole remains at Defense but he has top-10 players at every other position (except David Johnson at #11), plus both Phillip Rivers and Andy Dalton have been lights out all season.
1. Dude Where is My Carr? (FIL)
Record: 5-1
Last Ranking: 3rd
Analysis: In an effort to score brownie points ahead of the holidays (hey Grandpa, the Junior Riff Raff need a PS4!), I have no choice but to put FIL atop of the rankings. Beyond last week’s top two both losing, FIL deserves the top spot this week. He’s the third highest scoring team in the league and he’s averaging 145 points per week over the last five games despite only having two top-5 players on his roster (Matt Ryan and Saquon Barkley). He’s been a consistent play this season, but his schedule will get tougher after Toby this week: LKA! in Week 8; Tito Galen in Week 9; and, Makese in Week 11.