What makes #GMRRFFA so fantastic is its owners, a group of Riff Raff that have made the league one of the most exciting things out there in the #fantasyfootball world.
Every few weeks, we spend some time getting to know some of you, because understanding the psychology of owners may not be useful, but it sure is entertaining. With that in mind, I’m happy to share some of the insights of our reigning champ – Dead Sea (Unicorn) – who is casually celebrating his 40th birthday today in Hawaii.
Dead Sea (Unicorn)
Overall #GMRRFFA Record: 22-17
Playoffs: 3-1
2018 Record: 4-5
Current Power Ranking: 11th
Question: How many fantasy football leagues do you play in currently?
Answer: Two. Was three until the one manager everyone hated in the league won, then revealed himself as a Trump voter after the election and he'd won, so we folded that league after 10 years because we couldn't deal with him being champ. True story.
Q: How much time do you dedicate to fantasy football, and the #GMRRFFA league specifically?
A: Fuck man, hard to say. I read a ton of fantasy football/football content and spend an inordinate amount on the "boy chat" (as my wife calls it), so maybe two hours a day?
Q: What's the biggest obstacle to you engaging more in fantasy football?
A: Work and wife. Work has been so crazy lately that I sometimes forget to eat lunch, and I am usually out doing something rad with wifey on the weekends. Also, watching football when I have fantasy implications makes me incredibly stressed out.
Q: What would you tell someone who asked about #GMRRFFA?
A: It's the best league I've ever played in, and I have gained friends through it, which is a special thing. Also, the chat is funny as hell.
Q: What's the inspiration for your #GMRRFFA Team name?
A: I'm a salty-ass motherfucker when I'm losing.
Q: What #GMRRFFA moment stands out as the best since you've joined the league?
A: Obviously, winning the league last year, in particular seeing Nuk score that late TD on my phone while driving, then watching the final game with my in-laws and hearing them all boo Jared Cook whenever he was in a play, and everyone cheering when I beat Mark. I have great in-laws.
Q: What is your strategy when preparing for an upcoming #GMRRFFA season?
A: I generally tune out of football news until about a month before the draft, then I read literally everything I can find on rookies and player outlooks and create a crazy draft sheet in excel. Sometimes, I go on vacation to another continent and miss the draft entirely, though.
Q: Who would you consider your league rival and why?
A: I'm of two minds here. Generally speaking, I wish everyone else in the league all of the mishaps that could possibly befall their teams - injuries, bad trades, bad performances - because I want everyone else to lose. But almost everyone in the league is really nice (except Tito Galen, he's a cock) so I can't really say I have a rival.
Q: Since you've been in #GMRRFFA, which roster decision are you most proud of and why?
A: Without a doubt, drafting the top two quarterbacks of 2017 for a combined total of $16, then trading Wentz to Eric a week before he blew out his knee while Fitzgerald literally won two weeks of the playoffs for me.
Q: Who do you think will win the 2018 title and why?
A: Tough call, but I think either Tito Galen or Garcia. Both of their teams are incredibly stacked with home run hitters. However, I think Mahomes makes Mark a darkhorse who could sneak either one of them like I did to him last year.
Q: Which team do you think will place last in the 2018 season and why?
A: Smeet. Tough to start 1-8 and mathematically come back from that. He shouldn't have named his team after bad farts.
Q: While every other league is already inferior, what do you enjoy most elsewhere that you'd enjoy in the league?
A: The website and regular content are really special - I've never been in a league where people put so much effort into it. I also have to say this is probably the most competitive league I've ever been in, with the most involved and intelligent owners. (Commissioner's Note: In his old age, fairly certain the Unicorn misread this Q, but I'll take it)
Q: What else would you want to share about the league?
A: Boy chat is one of my favorite things and makes me laugh out loud almost every day.
Q: What is your favorite curse word?
A: Fuck. It works in so many forms, and really adds emphasis to language. Cause fuck you, that's why. Fuck this shit. You stupid fuck. I'm fucked. Fucking jerkoff. Fuck me. Fuck you. I could do this all day.
Q: In your opinion, what's the most underrated food?
A: Veggie burgers. They taste really good and don't clog your arteries. Big asterisk though - bad veggie burgers are *really* bad.
Q: If you were to get rid of 1 state in the US, which one and why?
A: Mississippi. Probably the most racist state in U.S. history, and still one of the most backward when it comes to things like human rights, healthcare, and education. Also, they add nothing to the economy. Fuck those rednecks.
Q: A penguin walks through that door right now wearing a sombrero. What does he say and why is he here?
A: "Que paso chambeador. Donde esta la mota?" He's here to party.
Q: What do you want to be when you grow up?
A: A grandfather. (Commissioner's Note: <sniffle>)
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